Reflecting on roadblocks

How do you overcome roadblocks?

During the middle of the courses I teach, I have an assignment wherein I ask the learners (via a few prompts) to reflect on how they are doing in the course, and to consider what they need to do to accomplish their goals for the course by the end of the semester. 

The last prompt I provide in this assignment asks the learner if they have any questions for me. Seldom do I receive any serious questions as a result of that prompt. When I do, they are usually fairly simple and straightforward to answer. 

However, occasionally I receive a question that causes me to reflect a bit before I am able to respond with (what I hope will be) a helpful answer. I received one of those questions last fall, and decided to provide it and my response here for others to reflect on it as well, in the hopes that someone else may find it helpful. What follows is a transcription of the email I sent to the learner, along with their response.

My email response

I really appreciate the thoughtful reflections you shared in your Mid-semester self-assessment report. At the end of it, you wrote:

 My only question is if there was at any point in your career where you felt like you've hit a roadblock in CS; and if so, how did you overcome it? After my first year as a CS student in college, I felt like I hit a roadblock after feeling so behind compared to everyone else and I struggled to overcome this. I understand CS is an ever changing field with platforms and new advancements always being added so it is important to always hone your skills while remaining proactive and positive. Regarding this, I know at some point again in my CS career as a student finishing my last two years in undergrad with a plan to attend grad school, I know I will eventually hit another roadblock to overcome some obstacle. I was wondering if you have any advice about overcoming these “roadblocks,” if you've hit one during or had a similar challenge throughout your CS career thus far?

To which I’ll respond with a resounding YES! I’ve hit roadblocks and experienced imposter phenomenon many times. 

 

Thinking back to when I was an undergrad learning CS is a few too many decades for me to precisely remember my experiences, but I’m sure I had roadblocks and doubted myself then. After graduating, I landed a job as a programmer for a company here in Muncie. I was with that company for nearly 30 years—until they didn't need me anymore. I’ve written about that experience in a blog post that you may enjoy reading. Here’s another blog post that tracks my journey from HS to now, as well. (I’ll not continue to link to other blog posts, but if you have time and interest, there may be others you’ll find interesting to read.)

 

For the last 17 years, I’ve either been in grad school (2.5 years) or teaching here at BSU. I certainly questioned myself as a 50 year old going back to college as a grad student. How was a 50-something going to keep up and be accepted by the other 20-something learners? But I persisted, and discovered it was very doable, and people were very welcoming. I’m now in my 15th year teaching full time at Ball State University. Especially during the first decade of teaching—but still now—I experienced doubts about being “qualified” to teach. Do I know enough? Am I providing the best learning environment for the learners? Am I being understanding of their needs and challenges?

 

These questions all led me to focus my research on education and learning, more so than on CS research. But even with better understanding of ways of teaching and learning, I continue to explore what I might be able to do to be a better teacher. Those thoughts of “am I enough” and “am I delivering enough” always haunt me.

 

I think, to a large extent, people who doubt themselves are the ones who take time to reflect on their lives and what they are accomplishing. People who have no doubts about themselves likely are not doing much (any?) reflection. I’ve found that growth mostly comes to those who are seeking growth—those who reflect on their current experience and consider how they’d like it to change.

 

So, I see the fact that you are doubting yourself as a good thing—you’re wanting to grow! Keep doing that.

 

I’ll be glad to talk more, if you’re ever interested in doing so. I also want to thank you for posing your questions. It’s forced me to take a step back and reflect a bit.

The learner's response

(Included with the learner's permission.)

Thank you for your detailed response to my question. I appreciate you including your blog postings, I really enjoyed reading them.

After reading your blog from 2017, I was inspired how you overcame your unfortunate dismal from the company you were working at from 1979–2007. I am glad that the “last pieces fell into place” for you, and you were able to continue your journey in CS as an official graduate student at BSU. I understand why it must’ve been difficult learning new languages after working in the industry for nearly thirty years and how you felt conflicted to teach your students since the weight of not knowing if you were “qualified” enough was haunting you at the time. After reading this, I realized this was your version of hitting a “roadblock” along with experiencing a case of the imposter phenomenon. 

Your experience is similar to how I feel at times; unsure about my skills and not fully knowing if I’ll be able to achieve a certain project. Despite your “roadblock” and uncertainty, you continued forward on your journey and achieved many things thus far, such as: presenting papers, publishing in journals and books, along with helping all of your students, myself included, at BSU since 2010. From your second blog from 2022, it was interesting reading about your journey from high school to Manchester University, to graduate school, and to eventually your current position–a senior professor at BSU.

Reflecting on my initial “roadblock” question after reading about your experiences, I know now that there is no easy road to take when confronted with an obstacle–there is no clear left/right path. There is, however, an upward path to overcome that brick wall and simply climb over it. Of course, this is easier said than done, but after reading about your journey it is possible with discipline, perseverance, and determination. The next time I hit a “roadblock,” I will reach towards that upward path and climb over the brick wall to search for the silver lining–just as you have.

I want to thank you for your encouraging words; I do want to grow, and I will continue to have this mindset that doubting myself will allow me to prosper as an individual and a CS student by reflecting on my past experiences and accomplishments.

Your reflection and response

Now it's your turn to reflect.

• What would have been your response to the learner's question?
• What insights or advice would you have offered different from what I provided?
• How have you navigated roadblocks in your life? 
• Have they taken you in directions you did not expect?

I look forward to receiving your responses in the comments.

Image credits: https://stock.adobe.com/

There are good people all around you. Recognize them!

The long-awaited MAC trophy!

A year ago, I was named the 2022 Ball State University (BSU) institutional winner of the Mid America Conference (MAC) Outstanding Faculty Award for Student Success. The trophy company the MAC used apparently still had a significant backlog due to COVID supply-chain issues, so the trophy just recently arrived on the BSU campus so it could be presented to me. This post is partially about me, but it's really about all the good people around us, so I encourage you to keep reading.

The MAC Outstanding Faculty Award recognizes one full-time faculty member nominee from each of the twelve MAC institutions that has demonstrated a dedication to student  success. From these nominees one faculty member that has gone above and beyond in their dedication to student success is honored as the winner of the MAC Outstanding Faculty Award for Student Success. That was not me last year, but I was recognized as the BSU institutional winner.

This student-focused award is distinguishable from academic or research-based awards as it celebrates the commitment of the MAC to a holistic student experience and the creation of an environment that supports success in school and in life.

My remarks

A few days ago, BSU held a celebration in my honor at which they presented the trophy to me. What follows are the remarks I made at that event.

This award focuses on student success. So, what actions do I take that I believe contribute to student success? I don’t believe there is any one big thing, but rather lots of little things that all add up to student success. Things like…

• Using active learning to keep class engaging
• Using flipped learning by recording videos for learners to watch outside of class, and doing activities in class when they can ask me questions
• Being learner centered
• Having learners do reflective writing
• Being aware of disabilities, and doing what I can to support those learners
• Doing what I can to keep diversity, equity, and inclusiveness as part of the conversation
• Using alternative grading, primarily specifications grading, so learners can grow from their mistakes
• Emphasizing the workforce competencies they are indirectly learning
• Mentoring immersive learning projects to provide participants a rich learning experience

I make myself very available to learners during class, via email, and in my office (both physically and online) at a variety of hours during the day, since leaners often have questions after 5:00 PM. My goal always is to find a way to help learners understand, learn, and retain the material.

I often tell learners who are regular visitors to my office: “I’ll work at least as hard as you will, to help you learn this material.” What I’m telling them is that if they are trying, I’ll be right there with them—but they must put in some effort.

But this recognition is not fully about me. It’s about all of us in this room, and across campus. I happen to be the one who has a very supportive department chair, Jennifer Coy, who submitted the award nomination that was selected to be the BSU institutional winner last year. But I would not be the faculty member I am today without the interaction, training, guidance, and support of scores of other faculty, staff, administrators, students, and family, all of whom I’ve learned something from over many years. I’ve borrowed tips and techniques from uncounted others, many of whom are in this room today. I firmly believe there are many faculty who are just as deserving—perhaps more so, but are yet to be nominated. I just happen to be the one nominated last year.

I sincerely thank the faculty and students to wrote support letters for me, and everyone who has interacted and shared with me over the years, thus allowing me to learn something from you. I appreciate all of you for taking time out of your day to come to this event.

President Mearns presenting the BSU
Outstanding Faculty Award to me

Good fortune strikes twice!

I also had the good fortune of being nominated by Kara Duquette for the 2022 BSU Outstanding Faculty Award last year. This award is given in recognition of demonstrated composite excellence in teaching, scholarly or creative productivity, and service by a faculty member who has an academic record at Ball State University of more than five years. Eight individual faculty, staff, and administrators from across the breadth of the university took the time to write and submit letters of support for my nomination. Submitted along with the 25-page nomination dossier, Kara and Robbie Mehling produced a four-minute video highlighting why I was being nominated for the award. Ultimately, I was selected from the nomination pool, and was presented the award at Ball State University's fall 2022 faculty convocation. Again, I believe there are many other faculty who are just as deserving—perhaps more so, but are yet to be nominated.

So what!?

So, last year was a good year for me. I received two significant awards within a year's time. I am extremely appreciative of this recognition! While I believe I do a good job, I also suffer a bit from imposter syndrome. I don't see myself as being that good. However, others around me do, and submitted award nominations on my behalf. They saw the worth and merit of being supportive of those around them and chose to expend significant time and effort to recognize someone in whom they believed. To be the recipient of that level of support not once, but twice, is a bit humbling for me.

I ask that you take a look around you. Yes, do it now. Who do you interact with that is doing a good job? Maybe it's as simple as they're doing what they're supposed to do, day in and day out—they're dependable. Let them know that you appreciate them. If their effort, ability, or attitude is rising above others, let them know that you noticed. If there is an award for which you can nominate them, do it. Regardless of being selected as the winner or not, simply being nominated is recognition in itself. 

Letting people know that you appreciate them, support them, and believe they are doing good, will likely be returned to you. I know I'm more inclined to go above and beyond what is needed or expected when I'm feeling appreciated by those around me. How about you?

So, who are you going to recognize this week?

Image credits:

MAC trophy photo by David Largent

BSU award presentation photo by Kara Duquette 

1,623 e-mail messages and 44 days later...

So, what did 1,623 e-mail messages and 44 days get me? I don't have all the answers yet, but let's explore.

First, a bit of background. I am one of a dozen individuals from colleges and universities located around Indiana who decided they would collectively submit a proposal in response to a Request for Proposal (RFP) from the State of Indiana. One thing we all have in common is an interest in helping people learn the mysteries of computer science.

The RFP was posted 44 days prior to the deadline for submission of proposals. Fortunately, it was during the summer when we faculty-type people have "nothing" to do and could thus devote our time to developing our proposal. (Actually, this is a myth for most of us. Summer is when we try to do everything we didn't accomplish during the rest of the year, while we're teaching.)

So, we started off slow, holding an online meeting to see what direction we all wanted to take the proposal. Gradually, some overlapping themes started to emerge, and we were off and running. Well, we thought we were running at the time, but by the time we got to the end of the race, we discovered we were just jogging--or maybe even walking--at the start.

I think we treated our journey in preparing this proposal as a bit of a road trip. And "what a long strange trip it's been!" (Sorry, I couldn't resist using a Grateful Dead album name.) We had a starting place, and a destination we had to arrive at by a certain date and time, but what we did in between was not planned for those other 42 days. Along the way, we picked up a couple more travelers (we started out with ten) and took a variety of turns we didn't anticipate when we started out. Some of those were based on choices we made, and at other times we ran into "detour signs" along the way and were forced to take a different route. Most (but maybe not all) of our re-routing ended up resulting in a stronger proposal.

As you've likely experienced, designing something by committee is always an interesting, and usually slow and frustrating process. I experienced that a bit this time, but not as much as I expected. We were relatively focused and headed in similar directions, and knew we had a looming deadline we had to meet. The challenges and frustrations I experienced were largely thrust upon us from external factors. It was a genuine pleasure to work with this group.

As one measure of our workload, I present the following chart showing how many e-mail messages I have sitting in a folder for this proposal. This counts both messages sent to me, and messages I sent. As you can see, we got a whole lot more serious about completing the proposal during the last few days!

So, what did these 1,623 e-mail messages and 44 days get me? I don't have all the answers yet (for instance, I don't know if we're going to be awarded the project), but let's see what I do know at this point.

After working with the other eleven professors (and a myriad of other supporting staff) for over a month (approaching 24 x 7 the last few days), I believe I've developed some new collegial friendships. At any rate, I've expanded my collegial network. I now have tremendous respect for many of these individuals, and (although I'm likely biased) I believe the others now have more respect for me.

I repeatedly practiced patience, listening, negotiating, cooperating, leadership, taking chances, and making myself vulnerable. I was able to fight my imposter syndrome a bit, realizing others value what I have to offer at times.  I found many new resources, both people and otherwise. Most importantly <grin>, I was also able to use my sense of humor (however strange it may be!) at key moments in our journey.

Was it worth it? Would I do it again?  The answer to both is a resounding "YES, in a heartbeat!" Even if we aren't awarded the project, I gained so much more from the experience. Having said that, I do hope we get the award, as I want to continue working with this group to spread computer science knowledge.

It is amazing how hard and long we will work when we're passionate about something. This was definitely a labor of love. I've come away from it with renewed energy and excitement! 

What have your received in similar circumstances? Leave me a message below, or email me.


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